confusion

sometimes you make huge mistakes. whether you let it happen or not..regardless you are stuck with the consequences. either with having to face people or just silently punishing yourself. can i say that God let me act so foolish? or was it my stupid sin that carried me away. i don't think God let me do it. i think i strayed so far from God that i did. everything's all out of whack now.

lost.

i don’t know how to handle it anymore..how do i hide from something that’s always there?? how do i hide from my own shadow? i pray and pray but that doesn’t seem to work. God seems to be not hearing my prayers..is that cus it’s so selfish?? or is it bcus i’m not hearing what i should be hearing.

can’t i just ask to be selfish for one moment? i don’t ask for much

i dont know.

im so frustrated bcus i need to think about the important things like my future. but instead, this plagues my mind. constantly. i’m being held captive against my will. i’m letting this hold me as a slave..

how do i hate without hating?
how do i forgive and forget?

i miss you

Put down your paper plate
Come to the table made
Deep blue china
Found on the table by the wine
So fine

It brings out flavor
Like You bring out color in life

Oh, I miss You so
The feel of forever
Oh, that taste I know
It hurts to remember

Unfortunatley high
Ironically dissatisfied
I miss You
I miss You..

I had a fleeting thought this morning
And I mentioned you today
It breaks my heart just to know You in part
And not be with You where You are


- Shane & Shane -

Psalm 30:5

Weeping may remain for a night, but rejoicing comes in the morning.

There are times of hurt and pain, but God only wants us to see ahead. Focusing on the pain now and on what is temporary will only make you lose hope. Nighttime always bring darkness, but no matter what happens at night there always will be light in the morning. The sun will always come up, no matter what, despite what happened the night before. There is such strong symbolism there. Paul tells us not to lose heart, and focus on the horizon because dwelling on the pain won't get you far. You have to focus on the rewards that will come later, on what God's promised, and deepening your relationship with the Father because even though there's all this pain and suffering now, God promises to replace whatever's been lost.