iGod > iPod

i miss you, God.

everytime i'm stressed, angry, sick, whatever,.. i seem to turn to music. whether it is singing at nrb, downloading or listening to my ipod.. it's the first thing that always comes to me. it's my remedy.

but lately i've been trying not to do that. i've been trying to make God my number 1, not my iPod. God's really trying to help me do that too, because dun dun dun, my ipod's almost broken!!!! i cannot listen to it without pressing down on the input thingy where my headphone goes in...it's really frustrating. but then i bet God up there is having a little laugh.

"You shall have no other gods before me. You shall not make for yourself an idol in the form of anything in heaven above or on the earth beneath or in the waters below." - Exodus 20:2-4

part of the ten commandments, the simple ten things that He tells us not to do, but yet it's so hard! i justify myself in saying that music isnt my idol..it's just music. it's part of my life, like breathing. but apparently, our jealous God considers it an idol, and i shouldn't turn to music but instead to him.

lately, i've been missing my ipod..but with doing some soul searching, i'm coming to the realization that what i'm really truly missing is God, not my ipod.

ba-bam.

life has come to shown me that bad things happen to people. the Christian life has come to show me that the bad things that happen to people, aren't caused by GOD. why? because God is good. He's good- so why on earth would he let bad things happen to YOU????? its illogical, for one..

we make the same mistake over and over, in thinking that whenever bad things occur to us it's God punishing or whatever-ing us. and i also understand we're human and we are stupid beings who make mistakes. it's another thing to be that human who gets away with those things. and then when something bad happens, you either blame it on God, or pray your hardest for Him to make it all right. but if you've had every single chance in the world to make it right, to right your wrongs, but still fall, then that makes me wonder where the problem actually lies.

it's like Joe said in one of his messages. we are always waiting for God to save us, that we reject everything else that comes to our aid. and later, when we fall or die or whatever, we blame him for not saving us. but duh, he already tried. he already sent us ways and little knooks and crannies for us to crawl out of our sinful ways to be with him. then the joke's really on us... "dummy, i already sent help to save you but you rejected!"

God is good and merciful and full of grace and love, but at the same time, we as His children need to do our part. it can't be a one-way relationship,.. we have to be willing to make changes. we forget to take responsibility for our actions and stupid mistakes, and in the end we give that blame to God. it's crufixion all over again.

i'm just frustrated because we have this life. this one life that we're supposed to live, and instead of living it for Christ and with dignity, we throw it all away for sin. then it takes the rest of our spiritual/physical/mental strength to pull ourselves back onto the path, and start from the very place that we left off.


***
Dear LORD- i pray and ask you again for your compassion. help me to be compassionate to those who decide to take the other road and show me to how not hate and judge. teach me to love those people despite everything, because you loved us - the very people who nailed you on the cross. when those fall, help me to love them and embrace them and be gentle with them and even pray for them, because that's what you did for me.

random rambles

life's so weird. it's a tangle of webs that we can all get easily lost in if we aren't careful. i never listen to what people say, and they're usually those that know me better than i know myself.

my life hasn't been the greatest. i know lots of people have been disappointed throughout their lifetime. people tell me i'm too nice, that i let people in too easily and therefore, i get hurt 100 times more. that's just it. that's my problem. i can't help it if i love too easily, and when i love someone/thing, i'm ready to put myself out there. i'm ready to die for that person, literally. but then there are those who see that as my greatest weakness, my vulnerability, and that makes me seem like a naive person. in psalms 25, david is crying out to God, asking him for strength to not let his enemies trample over him, like they are over me.

i think that through all this, God's trying to teach me something.

i've been selfish practically all my life, and right now, God's telling me to grow up. i need to learn patience. i've never been sucha patient person. to some people, i might be, but my nature is not patient. i have the worst temper (if anyone, ask esther) and i like to complain and have things my way. who doesnt? but ever since my journey into college, i can feel God's hands working through me. He's finally shaping me into the person that He's originally intended. and yeah, i dont necessarily like it sometimes. it requires me to suck it all up and to be the bigger person. but i know it'll have good outcomes. with improvement comes time and suffering.

To you, O Lord, I lift up my soul; in you I trust, O my God. Do not let me be put to shame, nor let my enemies triumph over me. No one whose hope is in you will ever be put to shame, but they will be put to shame who are treacherous without excuse. Show me your ways, O lord, teach me your paths; guide me in your truth and teach me, for you are God my Savior, and my hope is in you all day long.

Psalms 25: 1-5

R.E.J.O.I.C.E.

This is the day that the Lord has made, let us rejoice and be glad in it!!!

Even though the weather's crappy, my classes are giving me headaches, another round of midterms are coming up (AGAIN!!), and personal problems are a constant nag, i'm teaching myself- or i should say, God is teaching me- to seek him and rejoice before complaining.

you know that saying, Life's tough, get a helmet? well its very true. but how about investing in a helmet, how's about a bible??

corny and reeeally childish blog...
but God is GOOD(: