you give & take away. but sometimes, u take away TOO much.

so i just found out that my great-grandmother passed away today. like 15 minutes ago, literally. what the heckk? my grandpa on my mom's side died just not a month ago, and my mom's grandma just passes away too??

i understand that it's life. you know. life.

we are born, we live, and we die. and all is according to God's good plan. but i'm just gonna take a human second here. my mom and grandma are two of the most hard-working, praying, pious women i know. and i'm not just saying that bcus they're family.

but i wish i understood God right now. what exactly is your reason of taking away BOTH my mom's DAD & GRANDMA?? my poor grandma. i can't even imagine what she might be going through. to lose your husband & mother.


Blessed Be Your name
When I'm found in the desert place
Though I walk through the wilderness
Blessed Be Your name

Every blessing You pour out
I'll turn back to praise
When the darkness closes in, Lord
Still I will say

Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be Your name
Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be Your glorious name

Blessed be Your name
On the road marked with suffering
Though there's pain in the offering
Blessed be Your name

You give and take away
You give and take away
My heart will choose to say
Lord, blessed be Your name

i'm just having a hard time accepting this is all. how strong in faith do you have to be to accept that when you lose someone, they're not just dead but it's God who called them? OR, how low do you have to be to turn to nothing BUT God? is that even right? is it okay to turn to God when there's nothing else? but that makes it sound like He's our last resort. and that shouldn't be! he should be the first that we turn to.

i guess i'm just really confused. because i don't want a reason to be angry at God, but i'm human.